“the why of substractions…” by @m_blanc_

by @m_blanc_ in continued discussion of my poem (Thank you for your discussion!) MT: There’s the issue of repetition, which stops the reader, jerks them out of the flow, hence the removing of the repeated words/phrases you’re suggestion—right? Is this why you suggested that? @m_blanc_: My edit suggestions are not to soften the jerk effect Continue reading “the why of substractions…” by @m_blanc_

Considering edits from @m_blanc_

I think I see the general ideas behind your edits-to-consider.  (I may not, though–if you’re game, tell me more, tell me more..!) There’s the issue of repetition, which stops the reader, jerks them out of the flow, hence the removing of the repeated words/phrases you’re suggestion–right?  Is this why you suggested that? I kind of Continue reading Considering edits from @m_blanc_

The book’s critical success was driven in part by the enthusiasm of reviewers.

An impressively pointless sentence, courtesy of whoever put together the Wiki page for “This Side of Paradise” (via lazybookreviews)

This was a strange but interesting read and I would certainly read on if there was more to read. You seem to have got inside her head pretty well and captured the jumbled up thoughts of a teen. I found the breaking up of words a little disconcerting at the start but it’s clear this is the style you’re going for as it adds to the chatty nature of the character. You capture the nature of being a teen and aimless or certainly having all sorts of nonsense tumbling through your head very well. I have marked this in the higher range of what I have read on ywo. I like it – best of luck with it.

This was a strange but interesting read and I would certainly read on if there was more to read. You seem to have got inside her head pretty well and captured the jumbled up thoughts of a teen. I found the breaking up of words a little disconcerting at the start but it’s clear this is the style you’re going for as it adds to the chatty nature of the character. You capture the nature of being a teen and aimless or certainly having all sorts of nonsense tumbling through your head very well. I have marked this in the higher range of what I have read on ywo. I like it – best of luck with it.